Well Well Well, Tut Tut Tut

This morning I had a phone call with a certain Mr Keith Richards of, The Rolling Stones.

WE chatted about a number of mutual friends and enemies, I have never before spoken to Mr Richards – or ‘Keith‘ as his friends [ME] are allowed to call him.

He blabbed a whole load of stuff about a famous singer.

Well Well Well, Tut Tut Tut

I’m not allowed to even hint who this singer is or any of the mind-boggling FACTS he related to me.

I was shocked & amazed, in equal measure.

I have agreed to keep my big gob shut regarding all I learned. This is due to the fact she will have an entire chapter devoted to her in Keith’s new book: “I shagged everyone worth shagging whilst, simultaneously, taking loads of drugs and drinking copious amounts of booze AND playing guitar in the Greatest Band Ever: The Rolling Stones [Simon & Schuster, 2020].

Well Well Well, Tut Tut Tut

In return for my silence I am to be one of a chosen few allowed to advance review the book prior to its release in March , next year.

Have you noticed, so many things are to happen in March next year? Odd that, isn’t it? Did you feel that? If you did, then it’s you isn’t it. March is only about ten weeks away. That ‘s not long to wait, is it.

I said to Keith, “Your book’s title: I shagged everyone worth shagging whilst, simultaneously, taking loads of drugs and drinking copious amounts of booze AND playing guitar in the Greatest Band Ever: The Rolling Stones [Simon & Schuster, 2020], it’s shit. It’s too long, for a start”.

He told me, to change it now would cause a load of problems for the publishers, Simon & Schuster. I’ve had dealings with those cunts Simon & Schuster so I insisted he change the title or I’d spill the beans about BarbarElla.


Keith’s new book, Legend [Simon & Schuster, 2020], will be available to buy in March, next year.

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