They say every person in their life makes one big mistake.
One! I make a big mistake every single day
When you’ve made as many mistakes as I have you can’t help become an expert. I’m willing to pass on some of this expertise; not as an act of philanthropy or love of humanity, rather, because I have the crass audacity to be an arrogant twat. Another mistake perhaps.
I was going to tell you about the time I accidently fired a –redacted– and how to avoid doing that. But, how many of you out there will ever have access to a –redacted-? Exactly, none of you.
Ergo, I have chosen as my subject, Bondage.
I needed a dumb blonde so went straight for –redacted– but she said no. I then, obviously, went for –redacted– but she said no. So, obviously, I asked –redacted– but she wanted me to –redacted– in her –redacted– which I said no to. Obviously, I resorted to Sarah. Now, Sarah has a supreme intellect even though she’s blonde but, nevertheless, she said yes. What a dumb blonde